"It has worked for others but it won't work for me"
"I have been doing this for years but some others have done far better within a few months?"
"I am always the one who gets looked over for opportunities"
"I am working so hard, but it's not just working"
"If I am successful, I fear that it will go away"
Do you find yourself asking those questions? Do your thoughts snowball every time when something goes wrong? Do you find yourself feeling anxious?
If you can resonate with any of the above, this blog may help you.
Feeling Anxious:
This has been a buzz word in the society recently and we at least use it once during our day to day life. We are absolutely right to use that word frequently because anxiety is a natural biological response of the body, so it will live as long as we live. What is anxiety? Anxiety is our body's response to feeling stressed. It is the 'fight' or 'flight' response to a perceived threat. The third response is to 'freeze' and often people tend to forget what's happened in extremely traumatic situations.
I don't Have Anxiety:
First of all, that's a lie. We are all biologically wired to feel anxious as a way to protect ourselves. We often tend to avoid accepting how we feel because of the social stigma attached to emotions in general. The truth is you don't have to be mentally ill to feel ashamed of emotions. We have been brought up to suppress our emotions and 'get on' with lives. These social
Conditioning make us want to feel ashamed of our own feelings. In brief, as long as we have perceived threats like bills to pay, a partner who gets crossed, children being ill etc. we experience anxiety time to time.
Anxious Thoughts:
We experience thoughts and they generate a reaction within us. You could b experiencing the most positive thought in the world, yet end up feeling exhausted, worried, sleepless or anything else. It all depends on your unique responses.
Self-sabotage:
"I am fine. I know not to trust anyone or be cautious around people", "I feel better than ever. I am keeping busy these days", "I have dealt with it all. I am constantly tired though".
Do you notice the contradictions? Can you relate to any of them? These sabotaging behaviours occur when we don't want to accept how we are feeling. The reasons could be from trauma to social conditioning. Regardless, one of the most important part of growth is to be able to process emotions. Otherwise, we tend to adapt unhelpful coping mechanisms such as keeping too busy, alcohol, too much exercise, procrastination, unhealthy food etc. Any of those habits can stagnate our growth. As humans, we are born with the innate desire to grow. According to Maslow's hierarchy of needs, self-actualisation can be seen on top of the pyramid. But, when we have a pile of unresolved emotions it weighs us down in our journey for growth.
How to Feel Less Anxious and Turn Sabotaging Beliefs into Positive Beliefs?
There are three simple steps
1. Get to the root cause and turn off the movie that's playing in your subconscious.
One of my clients asked me at the beginning of the journey, 'how do we get to those memories'. It is simple. Our bodies store memories energetically and when we access our energies, our subconscious send us the relevant memories. We can trace those memories to determine the negative beliefs and turn them into positives.
2. Learn new things
It's imperative to learn new things during the journey of growth. Learning new things stimulate your brain, create new neural networks and release positive chemicals. On the other hand, as you are eliminating root cause of the anxiety/sabotaging beliefs, you tend to emerge as a new person. You tend to discover many things about you and experience different insights that you haven't possibly experienced before. So, it's important to continue the journey of learning.
3. Focus on vitality:
It is so important to develop healthy habits to keep your body and mind strong and resilient. Your body and mind have been through a journey of healing/recovery/awareness (however you want to call it) and without a clear action plan and good habits to keep the improvement going, we face to risk of losing perspective or slipping back to old habits. Nourish your mind and body and keep things consistent.
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Lots of love
Nisanka
I enable entrepreneurs and professionals to turn anxiety into growth through my 60 Day Programme.
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